Paradox

As a second year resident on cytology rotation, there were ocassional days when things were fairly slow in the afternoon. On one particular day, four of us sat around chatting. Somehow the conversation came around to our accomplishments and things of which we were proud.

The group mentioned going to medical school, completing a marathon, climbing Mt. Hood. One guy was proud of paying off his college debt and buying a house. Another person joked about the accolades he earned picking corn one summer. Nothing mentioned was earth-shattering, but they were important to us; they helped to make us who were and so we were proud of them.

And then, the lone parent among us chimed in (I was childless at the time): "The thing I am the most proud of is having my son."

"What! You can't be proud of that yet! He's only 18 months old - you don't even know how he is going to turn out or if he is going to be a good person! What if he turns out to be a serial killer. You can't be proud of just having him until he is at least 18!" one of our group retorted.

"Yeah," someone else interjected, "Any teenage girl with a horny boyfriend can have a kid."

This Mom held firm even though she couldn't really get us non-parents so see her way and eventually the conversation moved on.


Flash forward: Now, as the mother of two, I get it, as I am sure all the rest of moms (and dads, too) out there do. Kids are amazing and you love them like nothing else. They make it ok to be silly and childish again and they see the world like no adult could. With Megan it just seems right to sing "Happy Birthday, Dear Chair." It doesn't seem crazy at all that she pretends Dante is a mountain lion - Dante, the fattest, laziest and friendliest cat there is. And while practically everyone can write their name, I am still immensely impressed by my daughter's clumsy letters that more or less spell M-E-G-A-N. My kids make me happy and I am so glad to have them.It is a sentiment echoed by parents everywhere: We love our kids more than anything.

And yet, the one thing we want more than anything in the world is to have some time without them! Mom's don't want to celebrate Mother's Day by mothering their brood. No, they want Dad to take the kids so they can enjoy a childless afternoon. Parents don't want a bunch of gee-gaws for their birthday and Christmas; they just want some "adult time." Yes, we love our kids to death, but only if we can get away from them every now and then!

So you can imagine our delight this weekend as Mac and I cashed in on his parent's Christmas gift to us: a night in a hotel WITHOUT the kids!

Our location was nothing special - downtown Salem - and yet the trip was wonderful. Mac and I went up to the outlets and shopped together. Mac is a much better "shopper" than me, mostly because he is a die-hard consumer with a "just buy it" attitude. I always end up buying more when I shop with Mac and I almost end up happy that he persuaded me to get these things. This time it was a turquoise running jacket that Mac convinced me to get - I think it is going to work out nicely, even though I was initially skeptical.

In the afternoon, we took a NAP! That may have been the highlight of the weekend for me, as I love a good nap but I have gotten to take less than a handful of them in the last three years. Then it was off to the gym. Running next to Mac on the treadmill reminded us of our Philly days when we routinely worked out together. Saturday night, we had a great meal at the Joel Palmer House in Dayton. Being childless allowed us to scowl at the crying baby in a place that was otherwise filled with adults only. And there was no "mommy guilt" when I went for a long run Sunday morning (7.5 miles!).

We came home rested and refreshed and proud to be parents once again!

***Thank you Mamaw and Minnie for taking care of Megan and Liam***