Wednesday, October 27, 2004

Moo-Moo

Today I did something awful: I wore a mu-mu (perhaps better designated moo-moo). The mu-mu was probably my second biggest fear of pregnancy (after the delivery, of course), but after trying on three other frumpy shirts, I willingly chose the mu-mu shirt.

Sure, maternity retailers will try to fool you with regal sounding terms like "empire waist," but what they really mean is that your waist is as vast as an empire! Time to call a spade a spade - these shirts are just shorter versions of the dresses made for the morbidly obese and still about a foot longer than any normal shirt should be. The standard alternative is not pretty either, what I designate as the "tent shirt" - a shirt that starts from the shoulders and then balloons out from there to form the perfect canopy for a three ring circus (or at least the little acrobat growing beneath).

I can't help but ponder the discrepancy between maternity shirts and pants. The three pairs of good maternity pants I have are not only unbelievably comfortable, but they are more stylish than any other pants I have in my closet (perhaps this isn't saying much or perhaps I should let my mother-in-law shop for me all the time). In the mornings I can always find pants that I am happy wearing (note: it helps that I do only have three pairs), but I can't seem to find a satisfying shirt. It seems I will have be resigned to the mu-mu and the baby-bivouac for the next 10-13 weeks.

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